still got a job

Got fired last Tuesday from my kick-ass job at Outback for being a "Peeping Tom". It's almost like when they (the ladies) wear tight shirts, they don't expect you to do a downward visual assessment. Caution. That link is mostly for men and may offend the fairer sex.

Anyway, I headed over to the neighborhood McDonald's near my house in Guadalupe and filled out an application. I was hired on the spot. Some of my work is janitorial in nature (I clean the unisex bathroom), and the rest is pure gold. I make the fries. Hot, crispy thin-cut french fries. A definite signature McDonald's menu item. It's an honor really. I'm clearly higher up in the pecking order than that spazz that runs the drive through. He picks his nose and when he laughs it's sounds like a sheep bleating. He can't even speak Spanish. He relies on the drinks girl to take the Spanish orders. Jeez, we live in an area comprising the most dense aggregation of urban Spanish speaking people in Arizona.
Anyhow, I think I'm locked in on this job and I'll tell you why. Yesterday, the manager pulled me aside and said, "Eef, you doan clean bedder. You clean more time, no more pay." Wow, that's like an obvious vote of confidence regarding job security, right?
And while I prefer making the fries, that sense of security is more important right now, considering the looming economic depression. I'm still not destitute. I can still afford to bring beer back to the hobo camp by the Durango Curve. I can afford to eat at restaurants that offer a dollar menu. Every day, almost. Two weeks ago, I bought a Gatorade to go with my Keystone Light. Like I said. Livin' large!
TBC

Also on amazon.com, my newest release, "A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again". RIP DFW